Rejection

Sticks and stones will break my bones,
but words will never hurt me.

That's a lie. I just received the agent's rejection on DC and it hurts.

When I read the letter, all I saw was 'We're being extemely selective and, while I found this project intriguing, I didn't love it enough to pursue for our list.' This immediately translated to 'You're no good. Why did you send this crap to us?'

I put the letter down. Did a few household chores (housework doesn't stop just because you have a day job or a rejection). Thought perhaps the agent sees something in my work, something that's a clear indicator, regardless of how many contests DC has finaled in, that says this will never sell.

I thought about quitting. Seriously thought about it. Why write if you so obviously have a lack of talent? Why put yourself out there risking rejection and those hurtful words 'I didn't love it enough to pursue'? I have always written stories--I can continue to do that for my own enjoyment and with no risk.

I looked at the letter again hoping something in it would tell me if I should quit.

'You have an interesting premise and an eye for detail' opened the letter. Well, that's not exactly 'your story is crap' but it's not a big compliment either, is it? So I'm wondering now if it's one of those 'let her down gently' lines like guys use. You know the one -- 'I'd like us to be friends'. That tells a person where the relationship is headed, doesn't it?

Nowhere.

But I do believe DC has an interesting premise and, damn it, I do believe I have an eye for detail. One of my writing instructors once said 'The story is in the details.' I have to believe he was right and if he was, then I have to continue working toward publication.

That's the goal. And meanwhile, I can continue writing the stories I love for my own amusement.

With luck one day I'll find an editor or agent who absolutely loves my writing.

I'd keep my fingers crossed but that makes typing, legibly, awfully hard.